Many of us weren’t taught how to set boundaries as kids. Typically, if our early caregivers didn’t know how to set boundaries it is because their parents didn’t know how to set boundaries, and they didn’t know because their parents didn’t know either. And so on. It becomes a generational repetition of patterns. Teaching our children boundaries is an important step in parenting and giving our children proper independence, teaching them how to be in healthy relationships, giving them an opportunity to self-advocate and equip them with healthy coping mechanisms as they go out into the world.
The most important way we can do this is to get clear on our own boundaries and model it to our children. Not only does that mean we set effective boundaries with our children but they need to see us setting boundaries in our marriage, in our friendships, in our work-life balance, for our physical health, and more. This will leave a lasting impact on them and will guide them in creating their own boundaries as they grow into young adults.
As we model healthy boundaries in the home, show respect for each person in the house, and give each child the rights to their own feelings and appropriate expressions of them, we are demonstrating healthy boundaries for our children. We are charged, as parents, with the task of helping our children to grow up and make positive choices in life. Teaching them about limits and boundaries will help to provide a solid foundation for their futures.